Monday, April 22, 2013

Monday, April 22

When I mention to people that I have a blog, or more specifically blog friends, they get this strange look on their faces and I immediately know what they're thinking. They have an image of me at a computer chatting with a bunch of boring people who can't get friends in real life. This couldn't be further from the truth. My blog friends are all smart, funny women with jobs or interesting hobbies and skills. They are strong women who focus mindfully on the good times and never stop fighting through the bad times. I've been lucky enough to have a relationship with a lot of these women outside of the internet, either meeting them in person or communicating via letters, phone calls, or packages, and would love to be able to one day say that I've met all my blog friends. They are people I've chosen, and more importantly who have chosen me, because over the course of time it's been clear that in some way we connect.

This weekend one of my blog friends passed away. Late last year she found out she was sick and her doctors only gave her three months to live. She fought hard and lasted six.

Even though she hadn't blogged in over a year, we were able to stay in touch through the magic that is Facebook. I'm struggling with how to deal with this loss. Obviously I'm not grieving in the same way her family is, but I'm still feeling her absence and dealing with the sadness that goes with it.

Five years ago, when we first "met", I immediately connected with her because she was funny, brave, independent, and totally honest about who she was. She was the type of person I hoped to be.

Everyday I still strive to be that person. Now I have to try even harder, because there is one less awesome person like that on the planet. I have big shoes to fill.

Rest in Peace my Ducky friend. You will be missed.


9 comments:

Jaime said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend.

Visty said...

Aw, Tammie, I am so sorry.Truly.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Tam - I text you something similiar - weird huh? I can't shake it! So young, funny and strong. Geez. I may need to get facebook damn it.

Tammie said...

Peggy: I saw your text last night but I was at work and couldn't respond! But I was glad you took the time to send it because I Feel a if we're feeling the same way.

Nowheymama said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, Tammie.

Maria Rose said...

Oh my I am so sorry. Blog friends are real friends and their absence hurts. Thinking of you today my friend.

Daphne said...

I am so sorry to hear this. Friends are friends no matter in what context.

Anonymous said...

Aww, thats so sad, Tammie, I got teary eyed when i read that.

hester said...

Hi Tammie. I am so sorry to read about your friend's passing. She sounds very special. The death of a good friend is always so hard. Be gentle with yourself. love Hester