So.....a couple weeks ago I ordered some frying pans. They arrived last Saturday in a large, oddly shaped cardboard box. I usually like to keep boxes for reuse, but because this one was so big and I really don't have that kind of storage space, I decided to take it down to the recycling area of my apartment complex.
My apartment has about eight large trash cans designated for recyclables. The maintenance guys do a great job of keeping it all under control but on weekends the whole area can get a bit crazy. This being a Saturday, the bins were pretty full and since, as mentioned, my box was big, I had to move around the recyclables so as to make room for it. Now keep in mind, this isn't trash, just recycling, so on a normal day the ickiest thing I would have to worry about touching would be an old mayonnaise jar or maybe a soup can with clam chowder stuck to the side. BUT, apparently this was the day the neighborhood freak took out her recycling because as I'm shuffling around catalogs and milk cartons trying to create space for my box, my hand touches a giant, flesh colored vibrator. And it wasn't just a quick touch, I had done some full-on palm to vibe action.
After jerking my hand back I just sort of stood there holding up the lid and staring at the vibrator. It's not like I had never seen one before, I just didn't expect to see it there. In fact, I think I would have been less surprised had I found a body in the trash can. ( Side note: I watch so much Law and Order that I always kind of expect to find a body. ) But seriously, who recycles that stuff? I'm all for being a good steward of the earth but some things should just be destined for the landfill.
Now all that's left is for me to wonder what neighbor it belonged to..........