Thursday, October 1, 2009

Roots

This is the spot where for the past two years, I've had a vegetable garden. I pulled my last few scraggly plants out of the ground about a month ago. I'm amazed at how quickly the grass has spread to cover the area. I guess that's what happens when you dump pounds and pounds of compost in the same spot year after year.

This last garden was officially my final garden in Florida. Although we don't plan on moving for another year and a half (two years at the most), I've made the decision to not plant a garden next spring. It was a tough decision to make. I love having my little garden even though I rarely manage to grow anything other than a ton of tomatoes and peppers. The satisfaction I would get from going out into the backyard and picking some veggies to go with dinner was unbeatable.

The reason why I'm not doing it again might seem a little strange: roots. I want nothing to do with anything rooted in Florida. Let me explain.

Many of you know that Jay and I have a long(ish) term goal of leaving Florida. We are so completely focused on leaving that we are in constant purge mode. We look around our house and question how strong our love is for our possessions. Do we love this table/couch/bookcase enough to move it across the country? You'd be surprised how little I actually love. If it was absolutely necessary, I could leave with very little. I just want to get out.

So when I think about planting another garden, putting down more roots here, I get sick to my stomach. I feel like it would just be one more thing tying me to this part of the country. I feel like, symbolically speaking, I would be giving Florida a fresh start, another chance. I can't bring myself to do that.

Sorry Florida. You had your chance. You aren't the right fit for my family. It's not us, it's you.

Next year my tomatoes will be store bought.

15 comments:

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said...

Wos Tammie I guess I didn't realize how much you disliked Florida. I thought perhaps it was just family drama but the actual state I didn't realize.

I've lived somewhere that was not a good fit for me. It was painful and while not trying to sound dramatic it was a slow painful death of me and my spirit. I was so miserable and I spent more time crying than anything else. It was a lovely place to visit but I will never move back there.(Seattle)

I don't know your plans or where you want to be but I hope you can do it sooner than later. It really is like a weight lifting when you get to leave!

I'm counting down the days with you. Let's celebrate when the moving van pulls up in front of your new home/state!

Tammie said...

margaret: there has been some family drama but we've been trying to make our way out of this state for a while now.

you hit the nail on the head, living somewhere you hate really is like a slow painful death of me and my spirit.

fortunately, the hubs and i are on the same page and we have plans to get out. we just want our finances in order first.

having a plan helps me to see the light at the end of the tunnel but it will still be a long couple of years. (our plan is to move to the portland oregon area)

alisha said...

I think we're both in the same place with living somewhere that's killing the soul. I understand what you mean about not planting and constantly purging-I do the same thing! I just wish my husband was on the same page too! For him, it's just about doing what makes me happy...but it would do neither of us any good if he didn't want to leave here too. I hope you reach the light at the end of your tunnel sooner rather than later :-)

Jessie Earth Momma said...

Please, please, please, Tammie, please move to Washington!!!!

Sarah12730 said...

Where are you guys planning on moving? I understand the feeling, if the subject of us moving back to SW Fla came up again (which it has in the past, many times), I would fight it tooth and nail. I just can't live there. I like my small town in North Central Florida. I guess I'm just a little different than you, I can't tolerate regions of states, but can find little niches within them where I can thrive. I hope you guys can find your perfect place. Everyone deserves at least that much.

Penny said...

I remember the first time I lived in Alabama I didn't want ANYTHING to do with this state, when we moved to NJ I was so happy to trade out my drivers license and change my address so nothing I owned said Alabama on it.

Now we are back, and I don't think it is my forever home, but it is nice to be around family...but I'm still keeping my NJ Drivers license.

Barefoot_Mommy said...

Okay, so maybe you didn't mean for this post to be funny... but I have to say I think it's hilarious. My husband is from Florida and acts like anything dealing with Florida is far superior (including himself and florida orange juice). HA! I'm going to make him read this later. LOL

Tammie said...

alisha: we are in the same boat arent we. i understand your husbands side too. my hubs has wanted to leave florida for quite some time but ive only recently lost my fear of leaving.

sarah: the plan is the portland oregon area. we've done a lot of research and really feel like it is the place for us.

barefoot: that is too funny. i consider everything from this state to be inferior and i was born here! orange juice is all the same to me. but its quite possible that florida oj is all ive ever had.

hester said...

It's great that you guys have such a clear plan and want the same thing. I think that makes you half way there.

I know it was a serious post but the bit that said "It's not us, it's you" (or was it the other way around?) really made me laugh.

Betts said...

Okay, I'm going to have to make Vermont look really good so you decide to move here.

Mari said...

I love oregon! We can meet in Idaho... heh heh
...and you can certainly stay here as you drive cross- country- it'll be fun!

Bridge said...

Hey Tammie! I know the perfect town in SW Colorado!
and yes, when I live din NY it was so painful because I hated it! I did always seem to create a loving little nest of our own there.
be well. update me on your plans!

Tammie said...

hester: i was hoping that would give someone a chuckle. :)

Nowheymama said...

I felt the same way in KY. I left our house all whites and creams the whole time we lived there--ready to sell.

Dani said...

I am glad you are getting closer to your goal. I have friends that live in the Portland area and they love it.

Houston isn't my first choice as a city to live in. Austin will always be My City. It is home. Always will be. The Mr. adores it as well...but the business is here. Luckily God blessed me with my house which, as you know, I covet.

It is my consolation prize.